A Small Detour From Sewing
Today I want to take a small detour from crafty, cozy sewing content.
Sometimes the work we do with our hands asks us to pause and speak with our whole selves. And right now, it's one of those times.
I was reminded recently that I know certain things about how to navigate some of the feelings I think we all are feeling right now. Things I learned during my time working and leading others in the ethical fashion industry.
And that knowing carries a responsibility, not to be perfect, not to have the right words every time, but to share what I’ve learned when it may help someone else feel less alone.
“Is this Enough” And Why That Isn’t the End
I don’t often talk about my time working in ethical fashion, largely because it was a deeply vulnerable and transformative time in my life. And if you know anything about vulnerability and transformation, there's a lot of hard along with the beautiful.
But I’m seeing so many fellow creatives and small business owners struggling right now. Wondering what is the right thing to say, or what is the right thing to do in this collective moment of trauma. And maybe the reason I haven’t shared these lessons before is that I already know the uncomfortable truth, even if you follow all of them:
Nothing you can say or do will ever feel like enough right now.
No post.
No video.
No perfectly worded statement.
None of it will undo the harm. None of it will fully relieve the weight of shame, anger, disbelief, or sadness. Doing any of those public proclamations can't magically make you feel “better.”
That realization can feel defeating, and for many people, it becomes the place they stay.
Alone. Quiet. Frozen by the fear of getting it wrong.
But what I learned working in an industry surrounded by so many things I wasn't "enough" on my own to change is this... not saying something, anything - even if it ends up being the "wrong" thing - keeps you there. Alone and Afraid. Voiceless.
That last one, probably, is the kicker if you're a business owner, but especially a creative. Being voiceless means you're invisible.
And even though this moment isn't about "us", "me" or "you" in an essense, it is. Not in the way of sharing an analogy or a personal story to create commonality. But in the, take a good look, at "us", "me" and "you".
The Message That Changed My Life
In 2015, I was given what still feels like a miraculous opportunity. It was born out of something as small as a YouTube video and Facebook message.
I had watched a video shared by a woman I had never met. I was lying in bed, deep in my own healing journey, when something in her story cracked me open. I reached out to her through tears and told her I believed what she believed. I wanted to do something about the injustices she was fighting, too.
And she wrote back.
This woman, who seemed to have everything figured out, who was already doing meaningful work for women and girls facing injustice, didn't hesitate to invite me into her journey of speaking out. Her message didn’t tell me I was unqualified. She didn’t tell me I was too late. She didn’t tell me I didn’t know enough.
She told me I was exactly what was needed.
Not to be the voice, but to help carry the voices of others.
That moment reshaped how I understand advocacy, purpose, and responsibility.
Why I Eventually Left Work I Loved
If you’re wondering why someone would ever leave work filled with that much meaning and impact, the answer is both filled with emotion and empowering.
Advocacy requires more than visible action; it requires deep self-work. And eventually, I realized that her work was no longer my work. It's as simple and complex as that.
When you truly look inward, when you confront the uncomfortable truths about yourself, it has a way of clarifying where you are meant to give, and where you are meant to step back.
Leaving wasn’t a failure.
It was an alignment.
Six Things Working in Ethical Fashion Taught Me
These are the lessons that continue to shape how I show up as a business owner, as a creative, and a human being.
1. People Can Smell BS Long Before They Step in It
Authenticity isn’t just about being “real.” It’s about transparency.
Before I speak or share, I ask:
Is this something I genuinely believe needs to be known to live in alignment with my values?
Or is this performative noise meant to ease my own discomfort?
People don’t want to feel like they’ve stepped in something they didn’t consent to.
2. Understanding Privilege Is Non-Negotiable
This one is uncomfortable for us white girls, I said it, but friends, it's necessary.
The most important work I have done as a creative and business owner is the continued work on understanding my privilege as a white woman in the fashion and textile industry. It was hard. It was confronting. And I would start this journey again without hesitation.
It's taught me that the goal is not to be the voice, but to amplify voices that have always been doing the work. This work will be here long after we're gone, that's the hard truth of it, and those who have been leading the charge do not look like you and me in so many of the areas we need to show up. So, if you really want to make an impact. Find those who have been making a difference and tell them, "I want to do something about this," and I promise, they will show you the way.
3. Compassion for Those Who Aren’t Ready
Vulnerability is terrifying. Speaking out can feel like stepping into isolation.
As someone who has been there, I want to shout, “You won’t be alone, just do it!”
But no one joins a movement because they were shamed into it. Or shouted at, or for those of us with "don't tell me what to do" personalities, it's a big sign to just turn around and walk away. Who wants that type of connection? No one.
Compassion creates openings. Judgment slams doors.
4. My Greatest Motivator
When I speak openly, one of two things always happens:
Someone becomes uncomfortable because I am comfortable with my discomfort.
Or someone feels invited to sit with their own discomfort and take a step forward.
I choose to focus on the second. Every time.
Not everyone will tell you, that what you shared mattered. Some will, but that's not the goal. What is, is that by sharing, someone else is permitted to speak or be heard.
5. Support First-Time Courage
There is no lasting impact in isolation.
When someone speaks up for the first time and says,
“I don’t know the right words, but I’m trying,”
The response should be simple:
“I see you. Thank you for sharing in your discomfort. I’m here.”
Correction can come later. Connection must come first.
6. Be Willing to Walk Someone Home
This is the thread that ties everything together.
“Be willing to walk someone home” means understanding that you are not meant to swoop in and save. You are meant to give. And sometimes, that ends up being a gift to you.
If you’re asking, “How can I help?” seek out those who have been doing the work for generations. Learn from them. Support them. Let them show you the way.
Because home is something we build together. There are those who've had the vision and the pathway to get there planned and paved, ask them to hand you what is needed next.
If you’re feeling like:
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“I don’t know where to begin.”
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“I want to help, but I’m afraid to say the wrong thing.”
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“I feel pressure to speak, and want to but don’t know how.”
You’re not broken. You’re human.
And you don’t have to do this alone.
Books that have guided me, but are not by far a complete list of ones I'd recommend if you're on this journey:
- Braving the Wilderness, Rising Strong, Dare to Lead, Daring Greatly & Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown - Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert - Hilda by Coach Jennie - The Enneagram Guide to Waking Up by Beatrice Chestnut - Beginners Pluck by Liz Forkin Bohannon - Women Who Run with Wolves - Radical Candor by Kim Scott - A New Earth by Ekhart Tolle - Becoming by Michele Obama - Tiny Beautiful Things by Chery Strayed - Gathering Moss & Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wallkimmerer - Dear White Women by Sara Blanchard
This is not about being a hero.
It’s about being a participant.
With compassion.
With humility.
And with a willingness to speak out when it would be easier to disappear.
In closing, here's my less complex advice.
Start somewhere.
Say what you want to share that is making you feel uncomfortable to yourself in the mirror, with a trusted friend, write it down in a notebook, or create something that expresses it. Don't let anyone tell you that sharing it publicly makes it matter until you feel you're prepared for the responsibility that comes along with being someone else's voice, along with your own.
And then seek those already helping, and ask them how to take action on the words you've proclaimed. That's when standing and speaking out for our values makes a lasting impact. That's when it's enough.